Kidnapping survivor shares her journey to recovery

*Grace was 21 years old when she was abducted from her home in Jos, North Central Nigeria. The incident happened sometime in December 2020, in the middle of the night. The kidnappers — about five of them fully armed — broke into the house through the living room window to take her away.

As she tried to process the situation, Grace was dragged out of the house in her nightclothes. She was taken into one of the cars parked outside. The rest of the kidnappers got into the other car and sped after the vehicle that took her away.

“They didn’t blindfold me or tie me up. They just put me in the car as a passenger and drove away,” she said.

Shocked and terrified, Grace regained consciousness in the moving vehicle, in the hands of a criminal gang who were giving her orders. The vehicle stopped after hours of driving and the kidnappers told her to prepare for a long walk.

They marched until she nearly lost her breath; the fear of being hit if she slowed down kept her walking for hours. Some of her captors stood in front to show the way, while she was placed behind them and the rest followed in a line. As they walked deeper into the forest that night, Grace walked silently behind her captors until her feet began to hurt.

She stopped walking abruptly.

“They kept telling me to walk fast and when I slowed down I felt a little throbbing here and there,” she said. By the time they reached their destination, her feet were swollen and she was completely exhausted. “I was forced to climb a mountain and when we reached the top of the hill they told me they had reached their destination.”

At that moment she realized that she had just been the victim of a kidnapping. She wept bitterly, hoping that someone had seen the kidnappers as they dragged her into the forest. She spent the night on the mountaintop, immersed in a cozy night until Cockrow. She had heard stories of women being raped by their captors; the thought of being the only woman among a gang of men terrified her.

The next day, she heard the voices of ordinary people down on the mountain and felt as if she were “screaming for help, but I was so terrified.” Later that day, the kidnappers spoke to her in Hausa, asking for a family contact. They contacted her uncle to demand a ransom of ₦5 million, but after a series of negotiations—which lasted several hours—her family paid ₦1 million.

From morning to morning, she was not offered a drop of water or food, but that was not her problem at the time; the fear of being severely abused and raped clouded her mind, she said.

“The money had to be delivered in cash to a certain intersection, where one of their men would pick it up. If they got the police involved, I would be killed,” she told HumAngle.

For her safety, Grace revealed that her family had not involved the police in the rescue process. An elder in the family was assigned to deliver the money in cash. The man delivered the ransom money at the intersection around 6pm and waited for her release.

When the money was brought to the mountaintop, the kidnappers took Grace down, put her in a car and drove her to the crossroads where a family member was waiting to secure her freedom. She would soon be free, as her family representative drove her away from the kidnapper’s lair and took her home.

Family and friends were happy when Grace regained her freedom, but her emotional torture journey had only just begun. She now had some abnormal feelings of fear and insecurity; she avoided those around her, especially when they asked for the details of her experiences in captivity.

She was free now, but there was a lot wrong with her. She stopped going out, choosing to stay alone most of the time and complaining about seeing people around her. She had a sleeping problem and was overly sensitive to human activity around her.

“I became more sensitive to sound, even when I’m sleeping,” she said. “I can be asleep and hear practically the slightest sound and wake up in fear.”

How did Grace rescue herself from this apparent post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD)?

“I signed up for an online counseling session and it took me a long time to let go of my fears. I also received a lot of support from my loved ones and I had to remind myself that it was not my fault that I was abducted,” she said.

According to a report from the American Psychological Association (APA), kidnapping survivors like Grace need help adjusting to normal life after regaining their freedom. The report urged hostage survivors to seek help from a licensed mental health professional, especially if there are chronic signs of stress and disturbed sleep — as Grace demonstrated.

Sendi Danjuma, a social psychologist who contacted HumAngle, explained that people who are released after being abducted often withdraw and avoid family and friends. She also said that it is difficult to reintegrate into society after being abducted.

“Moving from a situation of isolation and hopelessness, memory loss, fear of the event happening again, being overly cautious or paranoid are some of the challenges,” Sendi told HumAngle. He noted that some of the mental health disorders that hostage survivors may exhibit include post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), depression, anxiety or panic attacks, and sleep disorders.

“Being abducted is a traumatic experience, and the experience can manifest in how survivors think or behave,” she added, advising survivors like Grace to engage in physical activity and have a support system. “They can also practice mindfulness and adapt to positive thinking.”

For Grace, the online counseling sessions with the mental health expert worked over time with the support she received from family and friends who had to stop discussing her abduction. After a series of counseling sessions, she began going out more often than she would have in the past. However, she hardly trusts the people around her anymore and “I’m cautious about who’s in my space; I’m not as open as I used to be.”

Kidnapping for ransom has become a profitable business for criminal gangs in Nigeria. SBM Intelligence, a socio-political risk consultancy, reports that economic hardship, high inflation and a struggling economy are the main reasons for kidnappings in the country.

Between July 2022 and June 2023, 3,620 people were kidnapped in 582 kidnapping-related incidents in Nigeria and at least ₦5 billion ($6,410,256 as of June 30, 2023) was demanded in ransom, while verified ransom payments amounted to ₦302 million ($387,179), or six percent of the amount demanded, the organization said in another report.

Grace calls on people to stop blaming kidnap victims for their misfortunes.

“You hear people say that those who were abducted should not have traveled or stayed in such environments. I believe that if you cannot help with the recovery process, then please keep your mouth shut,” she said.