How Will Bravo Reboot ‘RHONJ’? The Best and Worst Scenarios

Photo: Jocelyn Prescod/Bravo

Our dark lord Andy Cohen has been saying for months that the way last season of Real Meatballs from Chicken Parm Farms was filmed was “untenable” and that we’ll see a “reboot” with “new faces” when the show returns for a 15th season. The only thing we know for sure is that the show will return, but will it be a hard reboot of the entire cast like we just saw for RHONY or a soft reboot like the upcoming season of RHOAin which a number of core characters and a number of new women come together, remains to be seen.

If I were the boss of Bravo (and thank God I’m not, because Captain Jason would be in every episode of WWHL) these are the scenarios I would consider, with their respective pros and cons, plus the likelihood of them actually happening in the real world, where I’m just an internet jerk who thinks way too much about Housewives.

Form: Teresa, Jen Aydin, Dolores, Jackie and Fresh Faces will be announced later (FFTBNL)

Advantages:The Tre Huggers will tell you that there’s no show without Teresa, and by refocusing the show on one of the few OGs we have left, it preserves the history of the franchise and brings attention to one of the most influential Housewives in history.

Disadvantages: Whenever someone claims that there is no show without Teresa, I always say, “Yeah, but the show sucks.” The problem with Teresa is that she also believes that it is “her show” and therefore demands blind trust from her castmates. This will continue no matter how many new women are dragged into her orbit. This scenario would also mean that Jackie, who had one of the worst seasons of Housewives ever, would be rewarded for her treacherous behavior, as would Teresa’s husband Luis (talk about a con man) after his comments in the finale about hoping Margaret’s son “suffers.”

Probability: Thin

Form: Melissa, Margaret, Danielle, Rachel, Jenn Fessler, Dolores and FFTBNL

Advantages: This is a group that seems to have a real, fun dynamic and has shown that it can give us both the laughs and the small drama that fuel a good season; Marge’s antics (sending screenshots in real time, the funeral flower stunt) carried the season. Jenn Fessler getting upgraded to full-time could also give us a chance to see more of her musical style.

Disadvantages: It’s going to be a lot harder for Melissa to be the center of this show, as she’s struggled to bring interesting personal storylines. (Remember the long-lost sister who never existed?) And if Melissa is there, that means Joe Gorga will be there, too, and many fans have been disappointed with how involved the New Jersey spouses are in the franchise.

Probability: Reasonable

Form: Margaret, Danielle, Rachel, Jenn Fessler, Dolores, Jen Aydin and FFTBNL

Advantages: Everyone feels that what’s dragging the show down is the never-ending feud between Teresa and Luis and Joe and Melissa (or vice versa, depending on how you see the events). Freeing the rest of the cast from that dynamic could reveal a whole new side to the women and force them to find new things to fight for. Teresa’s absence in particular will be a blessing for Jen Aydin, a good housewife stuck on the losing end.

Disadvantages: Every franchise is about something at its core, and Jerz has always been about family. Without a family dynamic at the center of the show, it can get even more lost.

Probability: I wouldn’t bet on it

Form: Rachel, Danielle and FFTBNL

Advantages: Bravo has been leaning more toward younger Housewives lately, and the show’s two junior members not only have youth on their side, they also have a good friendship and seem the most open to a new class of women. Danielle’s constantly crumbling family dynamic could also help the show retain its sense of self-worth.

Disadvantages: They’re not the most popular duo on the cast, and it would leave us without any OGs or the sense of history that Housewives shows often thrive on. Maybe they could get Lauren Manzo, Caroline’s daughter, into the mix as a link back to the past?

Probability: A good chance

Form: Teresa, a red-faced rage monster, and her donkeys

Advantages: Matt Rogers said right to Andy Cohen’s face that Teresa is the one keeping Jersey from being fun. What if they kept the cast the same but just got rid of her? Of course she couldn’t dismissed– fired, but how about a spin-off? I don’t think she and her family are that interesting, but I would love a season of Crappie Lake starring Teresa and Jen Aydin, where they have to do dirty jobs in a small town. These two can be fun and silly (or at least we can laugh at how dumb Teresa is) when they don’t have opponents. Maybe they should be given something else to do?

Disadvantages: Yes, the Tre Huggers are a virtual army, but I’ve always maintained that they’re a loud and vocal minority, so there may not be enough viewers to support a spinoff. But hey, if they give her a show and it fails, Bravo is exempt, right?

Probability: Please, please, please, let Teresa be fired.

Form: All FFTBNL

Advantages: When RHONJ launched in 2009 we were in the post-Sopranos era where Jersey was associated with mafia-affiliated Italian Americans, and it really pushed both that angle and the family aspect of the show forward. Now that the former is outdated (and a bit culturally insensitive) and the latter resulted in a decade of intractable family feuding, what if the show took a completely different turn? What if it was about a circle of young families moving from NYC during the pandemic? What if it was about dealing with the situation in the suburbs? This is a chance to show us a very different side of Jersey.

Disadvantages: There are some real all-stars in the cast and it would be a shame to let them go. Based on how little they’ve done with the legacy cast of RHONY since the reboot, I have no confidence that Bravo will make good use of the resources they already have. I do, however, have every confidence that the casting department will find us a coterie of undiscovered stars in the Garden State.

Probability: Reasonable

Form: Amanda Batula, Kyle Cooke and FFTBNL

AdvantagesOkay, here’s my crazy suggestion: Summer houseJersey native Amanda Batula has been trying to convince Kyle Cooke to move to the suburbs and start a family for years. They only have so many good summers left (à la Carole Radziwill) on their current show, so why not create a whole new show around the two of them? You know Amanda keeps in touch with her high school friends who still live in Jersey, and with Kyle around, we can still put the focus on the husbands.

Disadvantages: Not all Housewives fans are crazy about Summer house, so it could lose a lot of viewers. While Amanda is the emotional center of Summer houseit’s Kyle who brings the pyrotechnics you need for a good reality show. Bravo should find some other hotheads to surround Amanda to make it really gel.

Probability: Not in a million years, but it would be a dream come true.