I’m 101 Years Old and Just Published My 9th Book Here Are My 8 Best Lessons for a Long and Happy Life – NBC10 Philadelphia

There is an idea in our culture that is so wrong: that life is over when you reach a certain age. But your golden years, like mine, can be the best years of your life.

My life has required a certain amount of courage. I was born in Cleveland, Ohio, in 1922, shortly after Prohibition began. My father, a bootlegger, got involved in a turf war with the mob and was murdered in our driveway when I was only two years old.

I got married a month after my 19th birthday and went straight from my mother’s house to my husband’s. Three children and 25 years later I left that unhappy marriage and found joy in being alone.

In my 40s I had my first experience with supporting myself and being myself. I started writing for newspapers and later, after I remarried, I had the luxury of writing novels full-time.

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Today, at 101 years old in Austin, I live the kind of life that I feel happy with. I still do the things I love, like publishing my ninth book earlier this year, spending time with people I love, and reading. It’s a quieter life than when I was younger, but these years are good. I wish more people my age knew that.

Here are eight lessons I’ve learned that have helped me live a long and happy life:

1. Never believe that you are ‘done’

Some cultural ideas are good, but many are wrong. People give up their lives far too early.

If your mind is focused on what the culture teaches us — that we’re finished when we get to a certain age — that feeds into our self-image. If our self-image is that we’re going to be lonely and sad and useless when we’re 70, 80, 90, whatever, we’re going to believe that. And that’s really dangerous.

People have gifts they are not aware of and it can take a lifetime to discover them.

2. Talk to friends of all ages

My friends are a wonderful source of wisdom, energy and authenticity.

I have a few friends who are two and three generations younger. I’ve learned from them, and I think they’ve learned from me. Every decade teaches us something different.

There is a big difference between being 30 or 40 and being 90 or 100. And yet, when we come together, it can be fantastic because we can all teach each other a lot. It gives us a different way of thinking about things.

When I’m with my friends, we mostly talk. Talking is exciting when it’s good.

3. Let little things make your day

It is not the top of the mountain that makes us happy. It is the small pleasures.

Our culture often tells us that if you want to be successful, it’s a big thing. It’s a big effort. It’s a big payoff. But that doesn’t work. I don’t even know if the mountaintop exists, but small pleasures do exist, and they can be dynamite.

We need to understand ourselves so that we can be authentic and find the little things that make us happy. For me, that’s reading. Another is being with people I care about deeply — it could be family or friends. It’s a phone call, a visit, an idea, a shared concern.

4. Have the courage to be authentic

Courage is probably the crux of the matter for me. It takes courage to look at yourself clearly, to know yourself and to be authentic.

But it gives you energy, confidence and understanding of yourself and others. In the long run, I believe that being authentic — disagreeing with someone, for example — makes even difficult relationships stronger.

Being authentic is not easy. It takes some effort to get to know yourself. But it is worth it.

5. Do things you love

When I write, I feel different. I feel better. I feel happier, I feel more centered. I feel more confident. Other writers I know tell me they feel the same way. There really is something magical about creative work. Of course, it’s not magic; it’s an expression of the human soul.

The pleasure you experience from doing something creative that you love is connected to parts of yourself that are not always available or conscious.

It goes back to knowing yourself and being authentic. The way I do that is through writing. For someone else, it might be painting or dancing. Sometimes I come back and see something I wrote and I think, “That’s good.” That means it opened up my subconscious. That’s where the gems are.

6. Move your body, rest your mind

I have been working out with a trainer twice a week for about seven years. For a 101-year-old, I am strong. I can lift 10-pound weights and stand up from a chair while holding the weights. I am so proud of that.

When I had pneumonia and was in the hospital, someone told me that my exercise probably saved my life. So it’s not just a good idea — it’s essential.

At the same time, you need to get plenty of rest. The brain needs rest to rejuvenate.

7. Don’t get stuck in negativity

Negative thinking is common and deadly.

Why do some people feel optimistic and others, no matter what they say, come out negative? I believe that’s how we’re born. We come into this world as optimists or pessimists. Some people have such hard times in their lives. If a pessimist would say, “Why me?” I would say, “Why not?”

It is very difficult to overcome negative thoughts, but we should, as far as possible, acknowledge the positive and try to move forward with optimism.

8. Do what you know you need to do

As I get older, I’m often asked, “What’s your secret?” I don’t have a secret.

Longevity is what everyone knows to be true. We all know that exercise, good food, a healthy personal relationship with a partner, understanding yourself, a career that is good for you — these are the keys to a happy life.

But there is a gap between what we know and what we do. The problem for so many people is doing it. And that is more mysterious than I can explain.

This interview has been edited.

Babette Hughes is a writer who recently published her ninth book,Lessons in evil,” at the age of 101. She was born in Cleveland, Ohio, and grew up during the era of Prohibition and bootlegging. Although she had previously published a memoir titled “Lost and Found,” she did not publish her first novel, “The Hat,” until 2015. She lives in Austin.

Stav Ziv is a contributing editor at CNBC Make It.

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