side blog for the siterunner of bogleech.com, These things seem obvious to me because my memory…

sandersstudies:

sandersstudies:

sandersstudies:

sandersstudies:

sandersstudies:

The best quality you can have when working with kids is chillness. You can and should still enforce rules and expectations, but kids pick up on a lot of vibes and if you are chill, you become a barrier against unchillness

Sometimes kids don’t need to hear “this behavior is unacceptable,” sometimes they need to hear “bruh.”

If you set really clear expectations from the beginning, kids usually don’t need a second explanation. You can just say “dude” and they’ll correct themselves unless they’re actively trying to interfere.

“Guys, if you don’t behave, I’m not going to do the Fortnite dance for you anymore.”

“NOOOOOOOOO”

And if you truly commit to being relaxed 99.9% of the time, they will take that remaining 0.1% MUCH more seriously, when it is actually the most important thing. (For me, this line is crossed at unwanted violence or sexual behavior towards other students, but depending on the age group, the line may be crossed somewhere else: for young children, the line is probably more at dangerous behavior and personal risk.)

@vyeoh I hope it’s okay if I steal your tags and expand on them.

I have found it very effective to focus on how children’s behavior affects others, including me, before focusing on their personal risk.

When I tell kids, “Stop doing that because you might get hurt,” the most common responses are, “No, I won’t do that,” or “If I do, I don’t care.”

I have found that it is actually much more effective to bring someone else’s feelings and responsibilities into the mix so that they understand OTHERS better. Examples vary by age, but might look like this:

1) I know YOU feel good when you’re hanging from the top rail, but you make me very scared and nervous. Would you please stop so I don’t feel scared and nervous anymore?

2) I understand that YOU are willing to take the consequences if you open the fire alarm door, but if you do, I have to talk to the camp leader and write an incident report. That means we can’t play mafia in our free time today.

3) Hey. I know the street looks empty right now and we’re having fun, but if a car comes around the corner and hits you, I’m going to have to drive you to the emergency room and call your mom too. I really don’t want to tell your mom that I was watching you and you got hit.